Hipster Music

Dear readers, I find myself increasingly frustrated. Don't get me wrong: I was not surprised to discover that I had not heard of any of the bands whose albums comprised Pitchfork's Top 100 Albums of 2008. Given that I did not buy a single album in 2008, or attend a single concert, it would have been a rather miraculous occurrence if I'd had. In fact, I believe the last album I purchased was Billy Joel's Fantasies and Delusions in 2001 (a rather pretty collection of classical piano compositions, performed by the estimable Richard Joo) during my Young Republican days. I did, however, expect to have known more than a paltry handful of their Top 100 Albums of the '90s, given that high school was for me the time I was most current with independent music. You see, the crowd with whom I "rolled" were primarily Rastafarians, who took music quite seriously. Imagine my shock when I saw that none of the Rasti's music was represented by Pitchfork!

Not Satta Massagana by The Abyssinians in 1993, whose titular track verily served as reggae's national anthem; not Alpha Blondy's Yitzhak Rabin from '98, which secured Blondy's place as Marley's clear successor (yes, THAT Marley!); not even Fishbone's seminal album from 1991, The Reality of My Surroundings . . . Obviously, the fault lies with me, and I shall have to forget everything I have known about music to make room for Pitchfork. In truth, this thought filled me with a certain excitement--to discover 100 albums better than those above!--but then I tried listening to the first band mentioned on Pitchfork, Animal Collective. While consisting of pretty enough melodies and rhythmic beats that do indeed "move jah," (many apologies, dear reader, but when the spirit moves jah, one must comply. Oh dear, and there I go again!) goes on and on unyieldingly, to no apparent purpose. I am quite clearly missing something, and given my lack of knowledge of the Best Albums of the 90's, I suspect it is the requisite background.

So I shall begin a sampling of Pitchfork's Best Albums of the 70's (many of whose artists I am reassuringly familiar), and work my way up from there. Yes, the burden is heavy, but failure is simply not an option! I will become an aficionado of hipster music or die trying.

P.S. I have ignored several attempts by John to hang out this weekend, in part because I still feel somewhat peevish about his rude behavior, and in part because I am still unclear about what to wear in the cold weather, although it does seem that this might be suitable, as its title contains the word "hipster." Thoughts?

Unresolved Questions:

1. The title of my blog.
2. Hipster-approved cold weather wear.
3. John.
4. Animal Collective.

Newly Resolved Question:
1. Tight-fitting pants. According to friend of the blog, Cheering Anon, not all tight pants are uncomfortable! Under his/her advisement, I shall attempt to find a pair that is not quite so constricting.